NOVANEWS
Al-Shaykh Miskeen: The Syrian army battered the Nusra rat organization yesterday when the latter attempted an assault on an SAA position. The rats were seen grouping by local civilians and the army was given an alert. The following were sent to Rat Heaven:
Muhammad Shabbaana (Nusra leader)
Abu Ya’qoob Al-Ma’aani (JORDANIAN CHILD MOLESTER)
Naazhem Sa’eed
Ameen Jameel
‘Ammaar Al-Hareeri
Another one was arrested as the rest fled like cockroaches in the noonday sun.
Al-Shaykh Miskeen: South of the town, a cannon was destroyed by SAA. No other details.
Fighting reported here: Ibta’, Old Customs Building in the City, Daa’el, Tal Hamad.
Nawaa: The SAA has confirmed a redeployment in this town which has been declared “occupied” by the rat Jordanian-supported disease carrying filth called the “Abaabeel Hawraan” and other similarly grotesque degenerates. No such thing. A redeployment means the SAA has decided to abandon former positions in favor of newer and better ones. Just watch. The videos they are showing are of battles fought elsewhere. Don’t buy into the propaganda.
Naseeb Crossing: 2 vehicles, one a pickup with a Doschka and the other a flat bed with weapons and ammunition from Jordan’s military were destroyed completely by the SAA and NDF. All the rats aboard were incinerated beyond recognition, their carcasses then pulverized and fed to the stench-filled wind blowing into the Hashemite latrine they named after the river.
Tal Khudhr: 8 rodents were killed to the north of this rural hamlet:
‘Issaam Al-Badawi
Muhammad Kar’ali
The other 6 were not names and are believed to be foreign.
Der’ah City: On Suwaydaan Street, a vehicle with 3 vultures was stopped and destroyed. All the vultures were dead. None were Syrian. No other details.
DAYR EL-ZOR:
Huwayjat Sakr: 3 rats from ISIS were killed while the SAA destroyed their mortar and a truck filled with rockets. No names available.
LEBANON:
The Lebanese Army has arrested a rat leader of the rat group calling itself the Fake Syrian Army in ‘Arsaal. He was a commander fighting the legitimate army of the SAR in the Qalamoon. His name is ‘Abdullah Al-Rifaa’iy. His fate is unknown.
ALEPPO
We are delighted to report the deaths of 3 Swedish terrorists in Syria who left the the cities of Stockholm and Gothenburg to fight alongside ISIS (read: United States) in its was of nihilism against the people of Syria. Two were killed in ‘Ayn Al-‘Arab (Kobaani) and the other in northern Aleppo. Our middle fingers are extended out to the pack of rats who sired these vermin and we wish them all a swift descent to the Oven Roaster awaiting them.