ISIS Rat’s SMOTHERED IN DAMASCUS BY SYRIAN ARMY

DAMASCUS:

It was another bad hair day for Zahraan ‘Alloosh in Doumaa as the SAA continued to chip away at his defenses all the while reducing the number of rats upon whom he can rely for his final stand.

Tal Kurdi Farms in Doumaa:  The SAA killed 6 of his rats and added a pack also from the Jaysh Al-Umma, a largely Jordanian terrorist franchise whose only Chevy pickup with a 23mm AA cannon was sent to the junkyard by an RPG:

‘Abdul-Majeed Al-Khasaawina (JORDANTEEZIAN LEECH)

‘Abdul-Rahmaan Naqshabandi

Another 3 could not be identified from the group.

Al-Reehaan Farms:  THE SAA HAS ESTABLISHED 90% CONTROL OVER THIS AREA AND IS PURSUING REMNANT RODENTS.  EXPECT AN ANNOUNCEMENT SOON.

Hawsh Al-Dhawaahira:  Here, the ‘Alloosh clowns of the Jaysh Al-Islam lost 28 rodents last night to a combination of SAAF bombers and SAA artillery.  The work of our informants and scouts is incredible.

Al-Shifooniyya (Chiffoniere):  These rats belonged to Al-Ittihaad Al-Islami li-Ajnaad Al-Shaam (yawn).  They lost 10 rats last night to the SAA and NDF.

Zibdeen Farms:  A nest of Nusra rodents was roused and exterminated:

Muslim Turaydi

Ghaazi Muhammad Abu-Manna

‘Abdul-Jaleel Al-Haaj

Another 4 were foreigners and have not been identified.

Dayr Al-‘Asaafeer:  SAA forces based out of recently liberated Al-Maleeha (liberated on August 14, 2014) assaulted rabid rodents here and killed 11 while wounding 8.  Unlike the ISIS and Nusra, our SAA takes care of prisoners according to the Geneva Convention unless they are foreigners who can expect no quarter or kindness.

Nusra lost a large number of its rats at these locations: Al-Qaasimiyya, Al-Zamaaniyya, Al-Bihaariyya in the E. Ghouta.

Harastaa East of the Secondary Roundabout:  Nusra lost a pickup with 23mm cannon.  All 4 rats aboard killed.

Waadi ‘Ayn Turma:  Another nest of vermin destroyed by the SAA:

Fu`aad Zurayq

Munawwar Zu’aytar (already reported yesterday. LEBANTEEZIAN REPTILE)

Jawbar:  Al-Manaasher Roundabout and SE of the Teachers’ Tower, SAA killed 7 rodents.